More music

This is the final week of January's Self Portrait Challenge... or maybe the first week of February's, I am not sure. So i did a mix between the two themes. The January theme was/is New Years Resolutions and the February theme is/will be black and white... SO I am doing a resolution in black and white :)

This year I resolve to actually *learn* to play my guitar... real music, write songs, not just play the few chords I know...

Wishes and candles...

Well, I am *finally* getting around to posting for Create a Connection. I don't know where my time has been lately, but I seem to run out of it quickly these days.

As I was going through the different challenges from last week I came across two that I liked very much... The first was Thursday's photo challenge of taking a candle lit photograph, and the second was Saturday's Try day challenge, Making magic happen...

So, first I give you my candle lit photo... not too impressive, but considering I took it at about 2 in the AM with no preparation and no fooling around with the settings on my camera i am not too dissapointed. Also there is no photoshopping on this except for cropping... I am short on time today:)



And what is more appropriate to go along with a candle than wishes??? On Saturday the theme, or challenge for Try Day was to make magic together... to do this we made wishes... Here, I will just cut and paste the actual description of it all here so you can read it...
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I’d like to ask you to both make a wish (as many as you'd like) and to support each other’s wishes. It’s very simple. Just post on your blog something you really, truly, deeply (and maybe even secretly) wish for and leave a comment here to let us all know that you’ve done so.

Then everyone who is participating in Create a Connection, and anyone who sees this post, please go to each and every one of our wishes and in the comments write, “As _______ wishes for herself, so I wish for her also.” Encourage people to go over and do the same.

And just in case people come to your blog who aren’t yet a part of Try Day, feel free to ask them to join in. Just include something like, “For Try Day, I’m posting this wish of mine. A part of the experience is having other people support my dream by including in the comments, “As _____ wishes for herself, so I wish for her also.” I’d love it if you’d take part and help bring my dream come to life.”

There is great power in knowing our dreams, in saying them out loud, in having them witnessed and in the shared enthusiasm of believing in and hoping for each other.
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So, there you have it.... Here is my wish. I wish to be able to manage my time well, so that I can have time to play with my kids, hang out with the hubby, and still have lots of time for my own projects.

So go over to Create a Connection and check out what is happening over there, meet some new lovelies, and have a GREAT day!!!

Look ahead, move forward, dream

I didn't get around to posting a SP last week... I suddenly seem so busy all the time. I have been painting, and working on some new idea's for that Etsy shop I keep talking about... soon I will open it... soon.



Anyhow, my Resolution this week is to move forward... Look ahead... Keep dreaming, and make those dreams happen.

Have a wonderful week!!!

Oh, and for those of you wondering... Yes! Yes, I did change my hair color. :)

Arizona makes my eye twitch...

Urrrrggg! And Pfft! And @#*&!!!!!!!! Arizona really irritates me sometimes. A couple posts ago I talked about how this year I was applying to become a surrogate... well, it turns out I cannot become a surrogate simply because of the state I live in.

I was getting ready to fill out the application for surrogacy when off to the side I noticed a little section that had a few states listed in it. On closer inspection it said that if you lived in any of those states you could not be elligible. Arizona was the 3rd state listed. So, I checked a couple other sites and sure enough Arizona is one of the states where the laws are written in such a way as to completely prohibit surrogacy. SO STUPID! I honestly do not understand why.

So, I suppose at least for the time being my plans of becoming a surrogate are on hold... Perhaps once I move to Utah. Utah was only listed on one of the web pages as a state they could not work with... And a google search did not turn info on the matter like it did for Arizona. My thoughts *hopes* are that Utah is a state that allows surrogacy... maybe the laws are a little tighter or whatever and that is why that once clinic does not work with Utah surrogates... I will have to keep investigating this matter as it is something that i *really really* want to do.

I am trying to not be too upset about it though. The way I figure it, when the time is right it will all happen. I will keep positive and continue researching my options.

And on a different note... Several bloggers have talked about the movie The Secret and for literally months now I have been saying to myself, "Self, you need to watch that!" So the other day I am driving and they are talking about it on the radio and I think again, that I HAVE to watch it... Then that night at work I massage my boss and after she gives me a gift... I open it up and right there in my hands is the move The Secret!!! So, I am going to watch that movie and soak up all that it says. I am going to apply it all to my life and just see where it will all lead me to.

A resolution for the new year...

Many thoughts in my head today...

There are so many thoughts I have had going through my head these last few weeks, these last months... So many things I want to get started on, to get done.

I have idea's and no idea how to make them happen... I only know that in order to get them done I must put one foot in front of the other and take a step. This post is most likely going to be very scatterbrained and there will probably be no connection from one paragraph to the next so bear with me... I am writing it mainly to just get it out there, I will work on refining it all after I jut get it all out.


I have spent most of last year getting in touch with the more artistic and creative side of myself that I had pushed to the side for too many years. I know that I am more whole with this part of me coming back out. I want now to do something more with this than create gifts for friends and family, more than just scrapbooking and making cards... More than just the occasional painting or pencil drawing. Now I just need to figure the steps out and take them. I have been OBSESSED with the thought of learning lampwork for over 2 years now, and have yet to actually go out and learn... I would like to finally do that this year, along with many other idea's I have floating around in my brain.

Last year (that feels weird to say, I am not used to this being a new year yet...) I was blessed with some amazing friendships. I was able to get in contact with some very old, very close friends with whom I had somehow fallen out of contact with. This happened at a very good time for me, a time when I really needed people in my life who knew me and knew what it was that I needed of them. I was also lucky enough to find some new friends who have also been a huge support to me. I look back at last year and I just feel so blessed by it all. I know in this year my friendships will continue to grow and I am going to put a greater effort into getting to know new people... You never know when you will meet someone who will have a profound effect on your life, and you never know just how you can effect someone else's. I never would have thought that some of the people i have connected with would have such an impact, but they have and I am thankful.

An on a completely different subject, we have decided to move *for sure* to Utah this year. It wont happen for some time still, but when we were there over Christmas my husband was able to secure his job transfer. So... sometime this year we will be making a HUGE move. A good move we both think, but still a little scary. There is much to do before we can sell the house, before Chad can leave his position here in Arizona and transfer to the office in Utah... but we have already begun on the first steps and THAT is a good feeling.

Another thing I have spent a large amount of time thinking about is having another baby... Now, I do not want to have another of my own... I want to be a surrogate. I have had many many friends who have had difficulties conceiving, and I remember in the summer I was walking one night and the thought popped into my head that I should be a surrogate. Immediatly I thought to myself "Self, you are CRAZY... You just thought that being pregnant again and having someone elses child is a good idea!" And then I said back to myself... "Self, why would that not be a good idea???" And I began thinking, really thinking about it. And to be honest I could not think of any really great reasons why it would not be a fantastic idea. So.... A couple weeks ago I finally got serious about it and started researching it. And, I have found several places that I am looking at now to send in an application :) The only thing I forsee being any kind of an issue at this point is that at this point I have no health insurance and that is something I would need to have, and also that we would be moving towards the end of this year and if things go like I would want them to, I would be pregnant at that time... Not too huge of a deal really, many families who choose a surrogate choose one from out of state anyways. So... yeah I am seriously seriously considering becoming a surrogate, and if for some reason that did not work out I will do egg donation... Maybe I will do egg donation first to come up with the money to pay for health insurance so I can be a surrogate... Hmmmmm... :)

Alot to think about, alot to do... Many steps to take. I imagine by the end of 2007 I will have walked many many miles.

Little bits from the trip

The last couple weeks have been really great. We went to Utah for Christmas and New Years. It was nice to be there. I did not get to see everyone i had hoped to but I got to see 2 of my best friends, and we spent alot of time with family. I don't have much time to write today but I will leave you with a few photo's from the trip... I don't have photoshop on this computer so I have not done anything with these photo's yet... some need to be cropped and all that good stuff... But, at least these will give you a visual of some of the trip. Oh yeah, all the images are clickable too :)




We said we were not going to buy any presents this year I had handmade them all... Then someone anonymously donated our family 100$ and at the last minute (The store had less than 45 minutes till closing) Chad and I ran to the store and loaded up on stuff for the kids... We can sure stretch a dollar!




This is my mom. She got this Buffalo Skull (I think it is a buffalo anyways) from my dad for Christmas... Don't ask me she really wanted it. At first it really creeped me out.



But then we started to play with it, and her beads trying to get some really cool new photo's for her website and for her myspace page that will be up soon.

Beads and bones go well together don't you think?? This first one the lighting was off, but it is still kinda neat.







And that is all for now... I will be back later tonight and hopefully get some more photo's of the trip up, and maybe my SP for this weeks challenge...